We’ve all faced aome toxic traits in partners in some relationship. They’re supposed to be warning signs but its easy to misinterpret them, what’s yours?
Could be anything from possessiveness or jealousy to argumentativeness or bossiness.
Part of me enjoyed them making every little decision for me. I think it’s why I ended up in that situation in the first place.
I was burnt out and just didn’t want to think anymore, they came along and just controlled everything. For a little while it was nice.
But once I started getting better, they didn’t want to relinquish control and it was hard to escape.
After 2 years I did escape, but I had to relearn what my likes and dislikes were. They had done such a thorough job of deciding everything I had forgotten even little things e.g. if I liked chinese food, or if that was just their preference.
Hope you’ve rediscovered yourself ❤️. I know faaar too many women in a similar position.
And I’ve known men, too. No indicator for OP, but its easy for anyone to fall into this trap.
I feel like I currently would be vulnerable to such a thing
Take care and watch out for yourself:)
When someone relied on me for every emotional need. It had me feeling wanted but it’s not healthy in the long run, even though it felt nice. (nobody should need to feel wanted, and nobody should rely on just 1 person for support)
Yep, same.
I know it’s not healthy, but in particular when I feel a bit unstable myself, having someone else be reliant on me, especially emotionally, helps feel me good about myself. And it also anchors me since I have a “job to do”.
But it’s not healthy, I know. And before you say “get a pet”, I do nowadays. 😅
Maybe I need a pet. I’ve been working on myself for like 10 years and all I needed was a pet!
I realized I had a bit of this myself when I saw barry.
Do you have examples? What does it look like when someone relies emotionally on someone else?
Well for me it was them messaging only me non stop, and them cancelling plans with their friends so they could spend time with me instead.
Yup.
Part of me liked being love bombed. Through therapy I’ve been able to understand that this part of me is the traumatized child who desperately needed love.
I feel like this is probably a common one.
They would stop replying to any message, be overall unreachable, ghosting me when we planned a getaway at that date.
I assumed they needed space. I’m fine with respecting boundaries, even if it stings nonetheless when you miss them.But stopping literally existing out of the blue?
How much time do you need? Days, weeks? Should I wait for you to contact me? Should we cancel this weekend?
No way to get an answer. No, nothing.
Just toss a coin and try to find out.OP asked about stuff you ended up liking. It doesn’t sound like you liked that.
I didn’t like the situation, but I still did it because I liked the relationship. I see where is the misunderstanding now. My bad, and thank you
That sounds unbearable, Im sorry. Any chance this person was actually married or in another relationship?
Nope, autistic burnout. Is the reason I stayed, for someone genuinely struggling.
But now I’m out, never ever again.That’s good. Hope you’re doimg better.
Yelling and angry arguing. I grew up in an environment where everything is under the surface and behind your back so it felt like emotional honesty and made me feel like I could trust her more.
