Desire Paths

“This chemical can be absorbed through your skin, and it’s even worse if you’re sweating while wearing the band because it can get into your pores”

It’s more of a “Junk Drawer” in my family. Just for things that have no relevant places or are easily categorized, but are important enough not to keep somewhere more out of the way. Always contains at least one item that makes it near impossible to open the drawer on first pull and requires manipulation to open. For my family, it’s usually a hammer.

My Shiba very clearly is plotting to overthrow the government. Very externally visible inner monologue.

Same thing that happened before. You were fine with not existing before hand.

Non-consensual Dick Cheese in my new band name.

Havarti. Semisoft, a little tangy, nice on a cracker, melts well on things.

Tuna Sandwich

Ingredients:

2 slices Dave’s Killer Bread (21 Seed Variant), lightly toasted

1 can tuna

2 tbsp Hellmann’s mayonnaise

2 tbsp chopped pickles

1 slice muenster cheese

1 slice gruyere cheese

2 slices tomato

A handful of baby spinach leaves

1 tsp Grey Poupon mustard

Salt and pepper, to taste

Instructions:

1. Prepare Tuna Mix: Combine tuna, mayonnaise, and chopped pickles in a bowl.

2. Assemble Sandwich:

• Spread the tuna mixture on one slice of toasted bread.

• Spread Grey Poupon mustard on the other slice.

• Layer muenster cheese, gruyere cheese, tomato slices, and baby spinach leaves over the tuna.

3. Season: Sprinkle salt and pepper to taste.

4. Close and Serve: Place the mustard-coated slice on top, press gently, and enjoy.

Supervolcano eruption.

Typhon breathed fire and had fire in his eyes to paraphrase the Wikipedia page you should read again. Also associated with volcanic activity.

Twitter dies when advertisers realize there’s no money in paying to advertise there. The moment it becomes more advantageous to pay for the ads somewhere else, it collapses.

My district voted 86% for Trump to 14% for Harris.

I have no neighbors. Just people who will report me to the secret police in the future.

Do ya think the maga voters will understand that Trump caused the economy to crash if he rolls back all the banking and trading regulations?

Gender inequality isn’t solved via paperwork. If anything that would make pay equity even harder to achieve.

The movie Trick 'r Treat, scaring the neighborhood kids, and blowing out all the jack o lanterns at 12:01.

And leave out a bowl of milk and a tray of candies for the demons/fairies overnight.

Haha. It’s always a vibe. Saw a little kid dressed as the warden from Minecraft and I pretended to have the darkness effect and gave him a wad of mini crunch bars. I think he was super happy to get recognized!

And they aren’t hard and fast rules. Just a sliding scale. And after being on candy duty for the last 15 years, you kinda just internalize it.

Plus, Halloween is all about the rules. Say trick or treat. Don’t blow out your pumpkin before midnight so the demons don’t get ya. Always check your candy.

There are rules for my parents house. I give out the candy there and we go through like 30 pounds of it in a night.

Not Saying Trick or Treat? No Candy. (EDIT: If they don’t say it, I always ask them “What do you say?” Which is funny too. Sometimes they go through “Thank you” “Happy Halloween” then finally get to “Trick or Treat.” Then they do get their appropriate amount of candy.)

Saying Trick or Treat with no costume? One candy, low tier.

Trick or Treat with Costume? 2 pieces, probably some chocolate.

Trick or Treat with High Effort or Very Unique costume I haven’t seen 10 of all night? 3-4 pieces def some chocolate and a ring pop.

Within that, older siblings escorting younger? Extra piece + glow stick.

Family Costume Set? Extra piece and my mom takes a picture of them.

I scare the shit out of you when I rip the door open? Extra piece?

I scare you and you cry? Extra chocolate.

Babies? Mom deserves an extra piece.

Truck bros park in the dead center of 4 spots.

I know all my berries have leptons!